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बिखरी निगाहें
ख्वाब में डूबी
कलम की स्याही से
ली है करवटें मैंने
दर्द भरे इन घावों को
हैं आज उड़ने की ख्वाइश
काश होते पंख मेरे भी
पूरी करता मैं तेरी सारी फरमाइश
This is my first attempt in writing a Hindi poem. Thank You Meenakshi for helping me out with this :-)
The English translation is as follows:
The English translation is as follows:
scattered gazes
immersed in thoughts
scribbling fate
I turn around
wounds hurt
they wish to fly
I long for wings
to fulfill all your dreams
This Poem is shared with dVerse Open Link Night.
i just like the elegance of the written hindi even though i can't read.. deep and intense emotions in this...the wounds..the wishing for wings...
ReplyDeleteJust beautiful, Green Speck. I can't imagine it would be any more beautiful in Hindi. The last two lines...loved them!
ReplyDeleteThank You Mary :-)
DeleteAs always, your work is superb sir. Take flight with those wings...
ReplyDeleteThanks Keith :-)
Deletenice...i like the longing for wings to fulfil their dreams...the hindi script is beautiful as well...
ReplyDeleteI like longing for wings to fulfill their dreams...magical.
ReplyDeleteThanks Ayala :-)
DeleteThe Hindi is beautiful--poetic just in its imagery! and that line, scribbling fate--perfect!!
ReplyDeleteI too would love to have wings...I'll make your dreams come true too! ...beautiful, so beautiful :)
ReplyDeleteSpot on! I'd love to fly too!
ReplyDeleteMine’s HERE
Thanks ... I would love to fly too :-)
Deletewow...perfect translation..:)
ReplyDeleteThank You Vandana :-)
Deletewha wah! I am glad you did it and wonderfully done, both versions are awesome.
ReplyDeleteI can't follow the Hindi! But a lovely idea of hurts flying away. k.
ReplyDeleteYou are most welcome!
ReplyDelete:-)
DeleteYour first attempt doesnt seem to be the first though...lovely poetry and lovely thoughts flowing with the current...I liked english translation more..feelings seem deeper there :)
ReplyDeleteTotally agree with Sadia. :)
DeleteThanks Sadia and Vaishali :-)
Deleteloved both versions today.. (but have to say am a little partial to the Hindi version..lee hain karvaten meine..)
ReplyDeleteThanks for liking the Hindi version ... encourages me to keep going on :-)
Deletevery nice, how we all long for wings to perform impossible tasks to please the one we long for.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for reading :-)
DeleteTotally worth the effort, no? :D I loved it. Maybe you should try writing more of Hindi poems too. :)
ReplyDeleteThanks Vaishali ... I will try for sure :-)
DeleteI long for wings
ReplyDeleteto fulfill all your dreams
A longing to fulfill a dream is always a lover's yearning. Nicely GS
Hank
Thanks Hank :-)
DeleteWonderful. Great that you translated and the beauty is felt in your words.
ReplyDeleteThank You ND :-)
DeleteTwo words- "Simply superb!!"
ReplyDeleteThe phrases "कलम की सियाही से करवट" and "घावों को उड़ने की ख्वाइश" refuse to leave my mind...
And your comment refuses to leave my mind as well ... thanks so much :-)
DeleteI love the visual beauty of the script..like tiny feathers..it is also beautiful to wish for wings for the dreams of another..
ReplyDeleteThanks Jae :-)
DeleteI love this ...
ReplyDeleteThank You Robert :-)
DeleteTheir written language is beautiful!
ReplyDeleteSo it is :-)
DeleteBeautiful,,I hope you do more of this,,
ReplyDeleteThanks Ellecee ... I would surely try !!!
DeleteElegant words, GS
ReplyDeleteI long for wings to fulfill all your dreams... how generous and loving, this phrase. I really enjoyed the read.
ReplyDeleteThanks Kim :-)
DeleteLove this! Written in such an elegant way. Nice!
ReplyDeleteThank You Lisa :-)
Deletei am assuming this poem is as stunning in Hindi as it is in English.
ReplyDeleteI hope so :-)
Delete