Sunday, February 24, 2013

Smile, Betrayed

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"Sometimes when I am alone, I cry," she looked at me, her eyes moist, betraying the smile that she had adorned all this while.

My heart went out to her, as I resisted the urge to hold her tight and hug her so that she could find some solace in the pulsating beats of my heart which swayed in rhythmic motions, dancing in its own free world with the blue veins and red arteries.

As I slowly walked towards the door, I realized that this was probably the last time I was seeing her; perhaps, she understood it too. Brushing her fingers against her moist cheeks, she said "Each love has its own destiny, Rick. Do not regret, 'cause we all are slaves to our fate."

I couldn't face her anymore. Like a coward, I ran out of her house towards my car. I didn't even care to turn back, to check if she was still carrying that deceptive smile which used to hide her pain and anguish most of the time.

Four years evaporated in a flash. I turned on the engine and forced my left foot on the accelerator. As the clouds of dusts gathered around my Sedan, I tried to locate her silhouette in the rear view mirror; she wasn't there.

I raced home. My wife and kids were waiting for me to celebrate my birthday.


This Micro-Fiction is shared with Carry On Tuesday.




41 comments:

  1. Wow - that's intense.

    But good to see a piece of prose from you :-)

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  2. well now...you set everything on its head there with the closing line...and perhaps it is for the best and he can focus on why he felt he had to go elsewhere than his family...

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    1. It's best for all of them perhaps :-)

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  3. interesting...your ending surprised me

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  4. Nice writing, G.S. ~~ It makes me think. What ifs, whys, how'd it happens, ever met befores, and ... ?

    A biggie that I thought was that the lady and man (Rick) were splitting after four years. Thinking like that happens with a split, then only splinters of the former relationship remain in ones mind.
    ..

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    1. This seems to be a nice writing meme. I may try it sometime. Cate also has one I've tried with my other blog but I really don't want to take so much time that I shouldn't spare doing memes.
      ..

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    2. You can try it too Jim ... waiting to read your story :-)

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  5. Wonderful prose piece. I wasn't expecting that ending at all, I'm glad that her silhouette wasn't there. I love the "solace in the pulsating beats" part, actually the whole sentence vibrates. Fun read!

    p.s. Thanks for staying connected.

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  6. Oh my goodness, adultery is so hurtful, if only the wife knew, she would be devastated. Think about it from the wife's point of view. Maybe a sequel? :)

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  7. Whew, that definitely was quite a surprise at the end! I enjoyed the write!

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  8. Wow... I was quite captivated to say the least.. this was a very intriguing piece.. perhaps the best as of yet? I think so.. and that ending.. that was such a shock..

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  9. Good twist in the end! Beautiful narration GS!

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  10. I don't know what to say....you can touch heart ...I can see ..

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  11. Nice piece,one has to return to reality.

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  12. I do like a surprise ending. Nice one.

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  13. Beautifully written and an excellent take on our prompt this week. Thanks for taking up the challenge in such a stylish way.

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  14. I love how you change things up on us sometimes :) this was quite powerful sir!

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  15. The reality of life nicely portrayed... interesting twist at the end though:)

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  16. A really good write, GS, I love the angst of it,you expressed so well, so hard to let go even when we know we are wrong,, I hope you will be doing more of this type of writing too,,,

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    1. Thank You Ellecee ... micro-fictions are challenging and I am eager to write more in this form :-)

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  17. I want more, this is captivating and I long for books of this calibre

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  18. A fine piece of writing. Wasn't expecting the ending. Well done!

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