(Image Source: http://ermiliablog.wordpress.com)
I am trapped
As the coffin plays with my soul
Relishing the taste
Of lost love and hope
Shrouded in darkness
Laughing at my struggle
Each attempt, futile
The nails on my fingers
Melting in the sand
Eyes under the mask
Draped in misery, now wet
With tears that catch fire
Burning my dreams
The wax reminds me of the candle
Where I flickered once
Not too long ago
The flame now silent
In muted oblivion
Searching for the way out.
But is there a way out?
This Poem is shared with
Wonderfully portrayed!!!
ReplyDeleteThanks Ritwika :-)
Deletescary, I almost felt claustrophobic!
ReplyDeleteMe too :-(
DeleteThanks for your contribution. The imagery was lovely and sad.
ReplyDeleteThanks Ermilia :-)
DeleteAm wowed....such gorgeously vivid images...wonderfully written.
ReplyDeleteThank You Swarnali :-)
Deletefirst of all I am visiting your page first time and I love the lay out.
ReplyDeleteand about poems, the dark, gothic poems have always appealed to me.
asteria
Thanks Asteria. Please keep visiting :-)
DeleteBeautiful and powerful words.
ReplyDeleteThe opening two lines are awesome, I thoroughly enjoy the coffin being personified.
ReplyDeleteMy favorite part:
"With tears that catch fire
Burning my dreams"
Great description and concept!
Thanks Jack :-)
DeleteYou've expressed the situation of helplessness very beautifully!!
ReplyDeleteBrilliant!
Very powerful imagery.
ReplyDeleteThanks Harshad :-)
DeleteThese lines: "...with tears that catch fire / burning my dreams..." are worth the price of admission alone. Wll done.
ReplyDeleteThank You Ron :-)
DeleteAm enjoying every piece of your blog now!
ReplyDeleteThanks Aravind :-)
DeleteVery scary..it left me with a spine-chilling feeling!! Nice poem :)
ReplyDeleteI have known this nightmarish anxiety well. vividly portrayed.
ReplyDeleteThanks Abin :-)
DeleteVery claustrophobic, I could feel the angst all through this. Gripping.
ReplyDeleteVery beautiful and powerful, this is the first time of been to your blog, I think I'll sign up to receive updates (for posts).
ReplyDeleteThanks Daisy :-)
DeleteVery powerful poetry ~ (A Creative Harbor) ^_^
ReplyDeleteWow. Very powerful and intense. I really liked it Green Speck!
ReplyDeleteJust amazing :)
ReplyDeleteThank You Izdiher :-)
DeleteWhew, this is indeed chilling! I do like your longer forms.
ReplyDeleteThanks Mary :-)
Deletepowerful and full of sorrow...with a glimmer, just a glimmer of hope. Which leads me to ask if you will join me and many others by participating in the gratitude quilt this year... there is info about what this project is and how to be part of it at the top of my blog.
ReplyDeleteWow ... I would love to ... thanks for the invitation Laura :-)
DeleteSome really great imagery here Green :)
ReplyDeleteThank You Jennifer :-)
DeleteLoved that phrase tears catch fire burning my dreams--very inspired! Excellent :-)
ReplyDeleteHow I wish I knew!
ReplyDeleteDon't we all wish for that :-)
DeleteNow that IS a question. Is there a way out?
ReplyDeleteFinding the answer? ;-)
DeleteYou have described a scary situation in a terrific way, I am trembling...brrrrr.
ReplyDeleteThere is always a way out, just wait.
:)
We should all wait patiently :-)
DeleteWe have a saying that "Death is final." I think that doesn't venture to argue about one's soul. That part is a great unknown.
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed your write about this struggle. Personally I believe that at death, one's soul is destined as God wishes it to be.
Thank for reading my version of one's soul as it struggles with one's will during life.
..
Thanks Jim for your insights ... it's always good to know your stories and what you think :-)
DeleteSometimes it feels like there is no way out!
ReplyDeleteI think we just have to look through more creative eyes.
You have said it perfectly :-)
DeleteWorld is round or oblong you may say so yeah there's really no way out, we just need to refresh our mind and think differently each time we feel tired and sad, just enjoy the journey of life!
ReplyDeleteThat's a good observation ... liked it :-)
DeleteYour words are amazing. Terrific writing.
ReplyDeleteThank You Bo :-)
Deletegreat sense of struggle and loss
ReplyDelete