I have known families, happy families, where love and
care exist. I have come across families, again, happy ones, where every member
pays respect to the other. Fathers, mothers, brothers, sisters, grandparents,
uncles, and aunts, joint families and nuclear families, it’s always great to
see the bond strengthening between all the members with the passage of time.
And when we belong to a happy family like this, we feel blessed, disregarding
the one small point that we have learnt to ignore all our lives – gender
prejudices, which is gradually overpowering the sense and sensibilities of the
future generations.
If cooking was just a woman’s job, every chef in the world
would have been ladies. Talking of chefs, the first name that sprouts in every
Indian’s mind is that of Sanjeev Kapoor. What if he too, like so many others,
had considered cooking not to be a man’s job?
Prejudices are like dry cough. They may seem trivial at
first, but once they infest your chest, imbibing deep within you, you realize
the seriousness of it all. You need a doctor if you let the cough breed inside
you. Who will rescue you if you are struck by this sickness of banal prejudices?
Another major role that is entrusted to the women is
laundry. Keep the dirty clothes aside, the ladies of the house will wash it –
that’s the general perception of most households. No one bats an eyelid, the
reason being that it is considered as an undeclared rule. Cleaning clothes and other household chores
are mainly reserved for mothers, sisters and wives. No, they never complain,
and it’s not that they feel bad about it, which again attributes to the fact
that we have taken it all for granted since time immemorial. However, work is
work, and they too feel the load of it, even though they never say anything,
and always fulfil the tasks of the home with a smile.
But what if men start sharing the load? What if household
chores are no longer a woman’s responsibility, but every member of the family
does his and her bit? What if we learn to shed our prejudices, and stop
labelling work in terms of gender?
I have seen my parents perform several household chores
together, whether it is cooking, or laundry, or anything else that pertains to
the well being of our family. I would say I am fortunate enough to have
witnessed something like this from my childhood, instilling a belief naturally
in me that the men and women of the house should equally divide the work among
them. Laundry is by no means an easy job. Whether you are washing the clothes
by hand, or through a washing machine, you have to invest a lot of energy and
time. The post-washing activity of putting the clothes to dry is also tiring.
And then, don’t forget the ironing part.
We need change, not drastic, but impactful. We, the men,
have to learn to not just #ShareTheLoad, but also feel mighty proud about it.
Only then can Gen Next move to a progressive level of maturity, getting rid of
faulty preconceived notions and steer towards a better tomorrow. If women today
are performing every task in the world, irrespective of their gender, then why
are household chores still tagged to them?
It’s time to alter our thoughts. This is the time to
#ShareTheLoad. Today. Now.
I am joining the Ariel #ShareTheLoad campaign at BlogAdda and blogging about the prejudice related to household chores being passed on to the next generation.
Distance makes love stronger, and comes with its share of
memories.
We met each other, and something clicked the instant we
started our formal conversation of ‘what are your hobbies’ and the likes. Soon
after, we were engaged to live forever, and eventually married. However, the
distance remained. While I was residing in Gurgaon, she still had to get
transfer from her job in her hometown, Bhagalpur, and thus we counted days,
hours, months.
Phone-calls started growing longer, and also the urge to
see each other again. We were together for about a couple of weeks after our
marriage, before we said goodbye to join our respective workplaces. While I was
fumbling among the codes in my IT job, missing her every moment, she was counting
cash in her bank, waiting for time to pass quickly.
And in times like this, what kept us going were our
memories – the beautiful week we had spent in Kerala right after our marriage,
our honeymoon and our first holiday together.
There are few things in life that can be compared to the
joy of your first holiday with your beloved. Far away from the mad hustle and
bustle of our daily lives, we had decided to spend our honeymoon in the
relaxing ambiance of Kerala. We swirled through the city of Kochi, lost
ourselves in the green mountains of Munnar, and discovered eternal bliss in the
serene backwaters of Alleppey.
We visited beautiful locales in the mornings, savouring
the fresh aroma of the places. We went to flower gardens, amusement parks, and also
enjoyed camel and elephant rides. We tried out different dishes, from the
ethnic Kerala delicacies to the other culinary delights that we could find in
restaurants, and had our tummies and hearts full. We talked, and laughed, and had
the best of times.
On evenings, we used to sit in our hotel balcony, and
watch the orange sun slowly going down behind the greenish mountains of Munnar.
It was a sight to behold, an experience that we can never forget. However, it
was soon time for our return, and the impending distance that would once again
crop between us due to our jobs in different cities. We knew that this
separation would be just for a short period of time, and within a few months
she would get her transfer and join me. Until then, we relished the memories,
going back to the wonderful holiday we had, and the amazing time we spent with
each other, cherishing each moment of our love vacation.
I wasn't born with a dictionary embedded in my mind, and
a few words entered late into my vocabulary. My first tryst with the term
‘adventure’ happened when I was in the fourth grade. There were many pups in my
colony, and I found them so cute that I decided to take one home. True to my
intention, I picked up one and walked towards my home, when quite unexpectedly,
I heard a low growl behind me. "Ah must be some silly cat," I thought. But hey,
cats don’t bark, and I soon realized it when the growl turned into a loud bark.
A dog, supposedly the mother of the pup had started giving me the chase. I ran for
my life.
I hid in an apartment garage nearby. I wasn't eager to
let go of the pup. I wanted to feed it, play with it, and make it my friend,
but unfortunately, the mother dog wanted those very same things. I thought I
was safe now, but no, she soon figured us out, and I was running
again, the pup still in my arms.
After several zig-zag round of my colony, I finally
managed to leave the dog behind. I felt victorious, the thrill emanating in the
beads of sweats wrinkled on my forehead. It was adventurous, picking up the
puppy, being chased by the dog, and then finding my way out of it. I went to my
home and introduced my new friend to my mom. Well, you can disregard what
happened next, as that’s out of the context. To state it briefly, I was ordered
to keep the pup back from where I had brought it. Now, that was another
adventure, keeping the puppy in front of his mother, and then escaping from her
shining jaws.
I became an adventure freak soon after. Stealing mangoes
from Seth ji's orchard became my favorite past time whenever I went to my
village. The mangoes were delicious, and thus you can pardon me from stealing
them. I, with my gang of five other boys, used to frequent the orchard late in
the evening, when Seth ji was not at home. However, one day, while we were
relishing the juicy ecstasy, Seth ji's car honked outside the gate. Alarmed, we
all jumped from the tree to run. However, in the excitement and hullabaloo,
Raja hurt his leg and started crying. Seth ji, who was initially shocked seeing
all these disturbances, now regained his composure and ran behind us with sticks.
We lifted Raja and fled, jumping in full force over the fence and were soon out
of sight.
However, in-spite of what happened that day, we kept on
visiting the orchard, eager to have the delicious fruit and prepared to embark
in new adventures.
Adventures are invigorating. I am no longer a kid, but
that adventure streak still lies deep within me, always looking for a new
opportunity to let go of the crazy thrill. #AdventureNme bring out moments that are forever etched in my memory.
