Monday, July 16, 2012

My Eyes Still Burn !!!

                                                                (artwork by Jack Vettriano)



The morning rush, the blaring horns,
Thinking of you has become the norm,
Heart wide awake, scanning the skies,
My eyes still burn in the mist of your lies.

The window opens up the naked road,
Sunlight weighs upon my heavy load,
Smoking the cigar, lips darkened with ash,
I fall down flat in this messy hash.

This dark gown I wear today,
The one you gifted me on my last birthday,
With arms around me you hugged me tight,
Our soft smelling fragrances melting in the night.

You vowed to return, majestic as a lover,
As soon as this war would get over,
I learnt to be patient, I taught myself to wait,
But then, why are you now being just so late?

The enemies defeated, territories regained,
The joy of independence, of pride and fame,
Merry making, it's time to celebrate,
Left as a loner, this is what I hate.

Didn't you return from the war, my love?
Why did you lie to me in our sheltered cove,
You promised to come back in my arms,
Why did you fib in the midst of your other plans?

The tears I suppress, drowning in the flood,
The water won't flow, they are thick as the blood,
And I know you would come back soon,
'cause you have to fulfill the promise of bringing me the moon.

The morning rush, the blaring horns,
Thinking of you has become the norm,
Heart wide awake, scanning the skies,
My eyes still burn in the mist of your lies.



This Poem is written for The Mag.













42 comments:

  1. Very deep, excavated true feelings from a very sensitive heart... Splendid!

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  2. So sad... I like your refrain at the beginning and end.

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  3. Like Laurie, I like that you repeated the opening at the end.

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    1. Thank You ... I am glad you liked it :-)

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  4. nice...really nice on the repitition and return once more to the top...the eyes burning in the lies...the wondering at where he is ...the conquests...it all builds really well and stirs the emotion...

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  5. Dear Green Speck: Love is resiliant; yet these lies corrode truth. "The window opens up the naked road," lovely line and 'cause you have to fulfill the promise of bringing me the moon.". The metaphors to war are also vital in the final analysis.

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    1. Thanks for the wonderful analysis :-)

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  6. This is so well constructed, sad and leaves the question of what really did happen to him.

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  7. I also enjoyed the repetition of stanzas one and two ... I sit here wondering what 'kind' of war her lover has been waging.

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    1. It could have been any type of war .... a real one with guns and swords, or the war we constantly fight with our inner soul :-)

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  8. Loved reading this poem, and I don't know why a song kept of going round n round on my head, wake me up when September ends!! Great work!

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  9. I especially like the 'mist' refrain, nice...

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  10. really liked reading your words....thanks for sharing

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  11. Touching....really great write....

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  12. The opening line is good attention-grabber - celever to use it to close the poem too.

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    1. That's what I thought too... and am glad you liked it :-)

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  13. Hi green speck,

    your poem is ineffably lovely and awe-inspiring, I must say.

    It was a pleasure having you visit my blog.Thankyou very much for your lovely comment. :)

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  14. Thank you for your cute comment. And this was a lovely poem.

    Love
    /S / http:// mydarlingsolitude.blogspot.com

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  15. wonderfully expressed the pain of waiting..

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  16. I hope he is safe...and her pain of waiting is nicely expressed.

    JJRod'z

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  17. I hope he is safe...and her pain of waiting is nicely expressed.

    JJRod'z

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  18. I hope he is safe...and her pain of waiting is nicely expressed.

    JJRod'z

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  19. Ahh!...Very sad.....But lovely poem!...I feel the pain of waiting is horrible than pain of knowing bitter truth!

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    1. The pain of waiting is really quite bitter ... it's better to be aware of the truth !!!

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