Hey guys,
I was just going through an older blog of mine (that I don't use anymore), and came across this poem that I once wrote. In fact, you can say it was one of the first poems that I had written, way back in 2008. I wasn't much of a writer then but ya, sometimes you do crazy stuffs. I too never knew I could write, until I started with this poem.
I agree it's simple and naive and childish, but very close to my heart...
Do let me know your thoughts on this :-)
(Image Source: Internet)
I fear sleep
‘Cause it shows me dreams
Unreal dreams
Dreams too fascinating to be true
Dreams about me and you.
It was the last time we met
The last time we held hands
The last time we kissed
The last time you said I will be missed
The last moment of joy
The last pathos, the last cry
The last drop of tear
Falling from your eyes
And disappearing in my lips.
We promised to meet again
We promised to be together
To be inseparable, forever
I promised you the moon
And you replied too soon
"No I want the sun"
I tried bringing you the star
But you went away too far.
The summer heat
The September rain
The intense crowd
In the metro train
The long queues
The ticket counter
The myriad movies
We saw together
Those long hours
With hands clasped
Resting your head
On my shoulder
The silent whispers
Filling my ears
With countless dreams
I shudder to remember.
I was just going through an older blog of mine (that I don't use anymore), and came across this poem that I once wrote. In fact, you can say it was one of the first poems that I had written, way back in 2008. I wasn't much of a writer then but ya, sometimes you do crazy stuffs. I too never knew I could write, until I started with this poem.
I agree it's simple and naive and childish, but very close to my heart...
Do let me know your thoughts on this :-)
(Image Source: Internet)
I fear sleep
‘Cause it shows me dreams
Unreal dreams
Dreams too fascinating to be true
Dreams about me and you.
It was the last time we met
The last time we held hands
The last time we kissed
The last time you said I will be missed
The last moment of joy
The last pathos, the last cry
The last drop of tear
Falling from your eyes
And disappearing in my lips.
We promised to meet again
We promised to be together
To be inseparable, forever
I promised you the moon
And you replied too soon
"No I want the sun"
I tried bringing you the star
But you went away too far.
The summer heat
The September rain
The intense crowd
In the metro train
The long queues
The ticket counter
The myriad movies
We saw together
Those long hours
With hands clasped
Resting your head
On my shoulder
The silent whispers
Filling my ears
With countless dreams
I shudder to remember.
Thanks for stopping by my blog, I am hardly getting time to give feedback these days, anyway..even though you said it was naive, I like your poem, particularly the closing lines..."with countless dreams, I shudder to remember"...Melancholic yet beutiful...seems very close to your heart, anything that comes from within will have a soul in it and your poem has.
ReplyDeleteKeep it up !
Yup the last lines are also my favorite...and you are right... this poem is really very close to my life...i really love reading it to it till day...thanks for appreciating :-)
DeleteThis poem looks a lot like a song, its quite a good lyrics, and am sure backstreet boys will do the needful if you hand this lyrics over to them, am not kidding, this surely is too good! An old poem revisited! Thoroughly intense feeling! Nice :)
ReplyDeleteThanks Dark Angel...but I wouldn't like to sell it to backstreet boys...I would prefer singing it myself :-P
Deletei loved your poem
ReplyDeleteThanks Poojak...Thanks for visiting my blog and liking this work :-)
DeleteThat is really a lovely poem...the one that has a beautiful tale to tell !
ReplyDeleteLoved it :)
Glad to have come across your blog !!
Take Care
Thanks Fatima...I am glad you liked my poem and blog...Thanks a lot for appreciating :-)
Deletehey, don't call it naive, dis is one of your first poems then you were already very, very good when you started, keep writing..beautiful words...:)
ReplyDeleteThanks Nupur...i started writing more after this poem...I realized writings are a great way to express your feelings :-) Thanks a lot for appreciating my work :-)
DeleteThis is lyrical and romantic....a bit sad too....
ReplyDeleteThere can't be happiness all the time....you need to cry to know how to smile :-)
DeleteYou know what? I loved every word in each line.
ReplyDeleteYou know why? Because it let me flow in the emotions you craved so wonderfully, I can't tell you how beautiful its is. It's not naive at all. it's the best I have read anywhere ever & no poem can reach the zenith you created with this poem. None of the bloggers can, not even in dreams according to me :)
Thanks for such beautiful words Tanya ... you made my day :-)
DeleteThis makes me cry :(
ReplyDeleteIt is straight from the heart thing... Raw and beautiful..
Sharing..! And yes i am proud of you..!!
Thank You Priyanka ... am lucky to have friends like you :-)
DeleteAmrit Sinha.. your poetry awes me !!
ReplyDeleteThanks buddy :-)
Delete